{"id":910,"date":"2024-12-08T00:01:00","date_gmt":"2024-12-08T00:01:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/?p=910"},"modified":"2024-11-06T15:04:31","modified_gmt":"2024-11-06T15:04:31","slug":"the-loop-closes-itself","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/2024\/12\/08\/the-loop-closes-itself\/","title":{"rendered":"The Loop Closes Itself"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>I ran into Schmelnoz the Incomprehensible this week!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I was drinking&nbsp;a Bloody Mary at a local bar when suddenly I heard this commotion.&nbsp; When I&nbsp;saw who was at the center of it I literally couldn\u2019t believe my eyes.&nbsp; Schmelnoz had gotten drunk and was attempting to impregnate three humans at once, much to the chagrin of their husbands and wife.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I quickly grabbed Schmelnoz and drug him out of the bar and back to my place.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>After he sobered up we talked for hours and I told him all about how I had met him in another timeline and how he had saved my life and that we were actually very good friends.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>He&nbsp;seemed a bit incredulous over the whole thing but he thanked me for saving him from an embarrassing situation and eventually went on his way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And here\u2019s the funny thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Just that morning just on a whim I had shaved my beard down to a goatee and mustache.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I\u00a0am now my own evil alternate-universe Spock self.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I ran into Schmelnoz the Incomprehensible this week! I was drinking&nbsp;a Bloody Mary at a local bar when suddenly I heard this commotion.&nbsp; When I&nbsp;saw who was at the center of it I literally couldn\u2019t believe my eyes.&nbsp; Schmelnoz had gotten drunk and was attempting to impregnate three humans at once, much to the chagrin&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-910","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/910","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=910"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/910\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":911,"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/910\/revisions\/911"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=910"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=910"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.spamrider.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=910"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}